Wednesday, December 31, 2014
Looks like
someone ruined the New Year. They all know I was upset at my Gramma for almost killing my mom on purpose who has cancer. They don't care who done what!
Glitch
My e-mail stayed highlighted after I checked it. They just want me ot feel inappropriate and won't stop watching.
It's funny when
you see someone live it up to please bad people. Then, they think they are living honestly to act tackily in some way concerning their instinctual side.
I actually have a right
to post about someone if they are mean to me.
They are trying to act like they're waving their hand in front of my face, again. They left the highlight color on as yellow.
They are trying to act like they're waving their hand in front of my face, again. They left the highlight color on as yellow.
These people just won't shut up!
So honored to be participating in the Red/White Song Festival today and I'll see you next summer Japan! Happy New Year! #NHK紅白
— Idina Menzel (@idinamenzel) December 31, 2014I AM NOT CHINESE. STOP HATING ON ASIANS. I DON'T WANNA RECALL THIS. WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN? GET A LIFE!
M*****ing Criminals
In private, they keep sending messages that are suggestive to me. I feel trained like in Operand Conditioning to feel a certain way because it makes me so mad and I just wanna put it on my blog. Out of nowhere, this machine in the garage keeps making these annoying grumbling noises with evil messages or threats to my sanity and serenity.
I do hope
things get better. It is a lotta work to undo saying "Ellen." She does some pretty radical things, tho. I'd like to keep her up in the list of suspects, but the rest of what I said was more rushed.
Misplaced Post
They won't stop bothering me. They keep being nasty, like they're waving their hand in front of my face.
I feel irritated.
I posted Ellen's name, and it just irritates me. What if she read it? If she doesn't, is it okay? It's not like I said something bad unless it was about something bad..
Mimic-ers
They keep getting at me for feeling jumped at by the idea of someone having kids, what they're like, all jumpity and excited and trying to like control my life. It's on the news, the anchors. They keep even more acting annoyed at me for it. What? What did I do? If that's all a kid will know, then they will be jealous of others. It must be a different generation. I guess they are just chosing one persona. When I moved here, that was not even an issue if you were annoyed at the idea of pretend kids. But now?
There's more. This is pathetic. The experimenters.
There's more. This is pathetic. The experimenters.
What It Means
..I can talk to people more if they are nicer to me. I wouldn't talk to someone who's acting like I'm psycho.
Issues
I have a feeling people will be nicer to me.
I think they were upset I accidentally hit my cup with my plate. I just did it looking more deliberate. I totally did not know I did it but didn't say anything, just looked innocent.
I think they were upset I accidentally hit my cup with my plate. I just did it looking more deliberate. I totally did not know I did it but didn't say anything, just looked innocent.
Wondering..
..If my Gramma went down to South Florida to spite me, why would it be right for her to ruin my cousin's baby boy? I don't think "people are disillusioned." That could only mean worse for me. I got up and felt mad at my Gramma eating cuz she made such an annoying noise that hurt my mom's breast cancer, and she did it on purpose and acted like it was to k*** her maybe.
They're just messin' with me.
Want me to waste more energy posting on my problems blog and getting away with it.
Who is this to/in what way?
I'm just reporting my problems. It's not to be nasty, but I felt people hated me. I should deal with it. I didn't address it to anyone. I dunno what to think about that, but it seemed like the same message, either way.
Moreover, I am sad that girl deals with this. I just know Ellen is nicer to her to punish me. Why look up to someone like that, why look up to anyone then? Ellen is using her and has offset her, it seems, or she just wanted more than 1 thing different.
Moreover, I am sad that girl deals with this. I just know Ellen is nicer to her to punish me. Why look up to someone like that, why look up to anyone then? Ellen is using her and has offset her, it seems, or she just wanted more than 1 thing different.
Just for Her
No one cares about Ellen. She is mean. She does stuff like pleasure I deserve in her place, like it's not even embarrassing.
I see people going around in glasses. I had said she was m*********** in pleasure putting my mom in glasses. I had just said I was happy to get my new contacts for the 1st time. I said that cuz she should be put in her place and she's an adult. I didn't mean anything sarcastic about the word! Just like symbolically, like how things were. I should have started to explain things already when I posted them. She thinks she's a joke spreading to others that they won't believe it tho she does not care but only looks for things that are obvious and easier to understand, like that what I said was bad, tho if you don't look at it sarcastically it might even seem nice/okay. Something went wrong. I was sure it was because of her.
I see people going around in glasses. I had said she was m*********** in pleasure putting my mom in glasses. I had just said I was happy to get my new contacts for the 1st time. I said that cuz she should be put in her place and she's an adult. I didn't mean anything sarcastic about the word! Just like symbolically, like how things were. I should have started to explain things already when I posted them. She thinks she's a joke spreading to others that they won't believe it tho she does not care but only looks for things that are obvious and easier to understand, like that what I said was bad, tho if you don't look at it sarcastically it might even seem nice/okay. Something went wrong. I was sure it was because of her.
Do you want this to happen to you?
You are a slave to this girl? You do everything I earned in place of me to her?
They also made those posts while I was awake.
What do you think I am, some animal or a n*****?
They are also doing messages to turn me off a certain way.
This girl has nothing to do with me. No one cares about Ellen.
They also made those posts while I was awake.
What do you think I am, some animal or a n*****?
They are also doing messages to turn me off a certain way.
This girl has nothing to do with me. No one cares about Ellen.
They won't quit.
2 guys who I liked talked to one another, and that girl posted a picture of another guy giving her money.
What's Even Mare Annoying
I think they are mad at the table I kept breaking off their insults by when I put my spoon on the plate. They were the ones bothering me. They were nicer at dessert for my brother. About that, why do I have to worry about others thinking my brother should not matter? I can just see it. Most people would be nice cuz they have hi self esteem, anyway.
Tuesday, December 30, 2014
Acting Uppity
They keep acting all giddy and uppity while I feel too relaxed, that feeling you get when someone waves their hand in front of your face.
It seems
my grandma has gone crazy and is thinking of my possible future daughter/kids being hurt, like they're her diarrhea.
I'm getting countless private illusions
of things to connect to this looking at the IMDb Soapbox. Those bad guys got nothin' to do.
Awkward
I don't like what I posted about in the specific/minor problems blog.
I didn't say it in a bad way. I just explained what it was. They keep doing it, so I explained what it was. It's a minor problems blog, anyway. Every day I get cyclical messages. Supposedly, I "did something," tho I try to ignore it. I can't seem to ignore all this. If I see someone do something, my parents want to do it to me.
I didn't say it in a bad way. I just explained what it was. They keep doing it, so I explained what it was. It's a minor problems blog, anyway. Every day I get cyclical messages. Supposedly, I "did something," tho I try to ignore it. I can't seem to ignore all this. If I see someone do something, my parents want to do it to me.
Upset
And my brother was just celebrating his birthday and sent me a message related to Ellen and then got in trouble cuz I started posting her name and started a new blog. This probably is a message for if we have kids. When they stick out 1 finger, like that girl when her dad was holding her.
PG - Rehashing a Bad Moment
Someone posted a picture of their dad, who happens to be Latino with dark black hair.. He was skinny when she was born, but he turned into being very bloated and round-looking. He stuck one of his fingers out and it looked strong, for some reason, maybe saying he loves each of his daughters. They keep rubbing that image into me.
What You Think You Deserve to Get
Just because you're all loving and caring does not mean you can steal from another's relationships. Isn't that the opposite of being nice? You forget that you could all like the same thing. But I'm saying that's not the secret formula. Lotta people are nice and deal with/put up with a lot. They don't want everything taken from them.
Further Thoughts
How is it that you think you really made it and I really didn't? You can't always come in and insult me and expect me to agree. This is getting rather vicious. It comes to say that my mom has cancer. People are vying for this girl over me, like I ever did anything. If people pay attention to me in a mean way is up to them. I get annoyed when that girl and my parents are involved sometimes. It's always a nasty, false message. I also feel because of Tim Burton and Johnny Depp I had false views of the world and cannot easily change in my environment. I feel stuck. I feel Ellen watching me making sure that girl always has something to do with my gains.
They seem to think they can be on top, as well. Now, they are putting in my face something I don't want put in my face by a person.
They seem to think they can be on top, as well. Now, they are putting in my face something I don't want put in my face by a person.
Just to Make the Report
People don't seem like .. I don't feel like anyone is paying attention to me since this girl and since my life became an experiment 10 years ago. I feel like I alone am unaccomplished. I don't feel I've done nor earned anything, while other have "done something" at all in their lives, opposingly. If I earned something, a reputation or respect or affection, it all slides down the chute to this girl. They pretend she's me: the look about her, her demeanour, her track record, it all. She is a beautiful human being, like the rest of us, but I'm sure she's been platformed on a pedestal. Ellen acts like she isn't being touchy about her to punish me, but I'm sure that rumor is false. She did it to get ahead and got me to not name her when I talk ever about these things that she thinks is obvious she did. I liked not bringing her up, but I already brought this up.
Problems Galore
(1) I keep getting made fun of for something I did before we moved away from Florida at home. Who'd know? My friends already dumped me.
(2) Ellen DeGeneres started paying attention to a girl. 1st, she got mad for no apparent reason and filled my room with bothersome sounds, clicks and the way my computer loaded or had annoying glitches. 2nd, after I cursed about it, not about her herself, she decided to "wait until I was done" and made her big move saying she didn't care about anything about me but instead it's all for this other girl. Now, everyone's doing it, like so. I had put her at the top of my Twitter followers. It wouldn't matter if it was just in Ellen's hands. People copied her, 1st I remember was Sarah Brightman and then Josh Groban. I think someone I haven't yet mentioned does it, but he keeps acting guilty or unsure partly about it, tho he's the current hottie around and the girl is lucky enough he takes a liking to her tho I see that the most recent hottie doesn't follow her as much in spirit and will.
(3) Every supper seems gone amiss. I just feel so attacked, like intruded upon, poked at, invaded.. I just make noises that sound like "stop" and that cut off the negativity. I was sad today they all pounced at me. I accidentally pushed my plate into my cup without knowing and not knowing why I did it. My brother did that on purpose once.. They kept reacting like I started it, but I didn't. How pathetic. Don't baby me and tell me what to do. I know to ignore it. Anyway, it was sad because it was my brother's birthday meal home from college.
(4) Sacrifice: It seems as though people are making my life shit and dedicated to shit insofar as Ellen and that girl go. I see lotta people in glasses. They might have known I got upset of something to do with glasses. I see people growing beards and mustaches. It makes me wonder. Now, tanning your skin? for that girl? because she's mixed but "fair?" The big thing is everyone is like in glasses now. The general thing is examples of ways people sacrifice for either female. They have more love for that girl. She doesn't have to do anything. They're just using me. They are using me as a foil to her. They want to act like they are something big and bad, but they're not big, just bad.
(2) Ellen DeGeneres started paying attention to a girl. 1st, she got mad for no apparent reason and filled my room with bothersome sounds, clicks and the way my computer loaded or had annoying glitches. 2nd, after I cursed about it, not about her herself, she decided to "wait until I was done" and made her big move saying she didn't care about anything about me but instead it's all for this other girl. Now, everyone's doing it, like so. I had put her at the top of my Twitter followers. It wouldn't matter if it was just in Ellen's hands. People copied her, 1st I remember was Sarah Brightman and then Josh Groban. I think someone I haven't yet mentioned does it, but he keeps acting guilty or unsure partly about it, tho he's the current hottie around and the girl is lucky enough he takes a liking to her tho I see that the most recent hottie doesn't follow her as much in spirit and will.
(3) Every supper seems gone amiss. I just feel so attacked, like intruded upon, poked at, invaded.. I just make noises that sound like "stop" and that cut off the negativity. I was sad today they all pounced at me. I accidentally pushed my plate into my cup without knowing and not knowing why I did it. My brother did that on purpose once.. They kept reacting like I started it, but I didn't. How pathetic. Don't baby me and tell me what to do. I know to ignore it. Anyway, it was sad because it was my brother's birthday meal home from college.
(4) Sacrifice: It seems as though people are making my life shit and dedicated to shit insofar as Ellen and that girl go. I see lotta people in glasses. They might have known I got upset of something to do with glasses. I see people growing beards and mustaches. It makes me wonder. Now, tanning your skin? for that girl? because she's mixed but "fair?" The big thing is everyone is like in glasses now. The general thing is examples of ways people sacrifice for either female. They have more love for that girl. She doesn't have to do anything. They're just using me. They are using me as a foil to her. They want to act like they are something big and bad, but they're not big, just bad.
Not Blaming Anyone
This is ridiculous my mom had eye surgery on one eye and has 2 kinds of cancer. This is unacceptable. I can only say I partly blame her for never sleeping enough. I don't know what it really was, but without blaming anyone even it is still a matter of consequence that is unacceptable upon terms that exist.
Overview
So, the incoming negativity fails to cease. My suspects are the following:
(1) people who experiment on me, nurses, psychologists, "social scientists"
(2) my dad
(3) Ellen DeGeneres
(4) other people who are popular like Ellen DeGeneres
I get the messages from them thru little noises like clicking in my room, which is the garage. It also comes thru being in contact with others, usually my parents, who have their own nasty messages. The computer loads suspiciously, as well, almost every time to me it feels, at least on certain parts.
The messages are little insults to startle me and make me feel out-of-control for some reason, maybe in anticipation of what they chose to do to me, legal or not legal. Hey, I even got hints that they crash planes and kill people to stimulate me, like say Ellen decided to do it, and she wouldn't just say no cuz maybe she thinks there is some case where her royal highness can give such decrees.
I don't know why I'm bad to people. I only got mad if someone did something to me!! You're supposed to, like you getting mad at me for no real reason. I do little things for fun or sometimes slip up a little, like in attitude, and this is what I get, the one who is called Miss Perfect by the whole class? That's suggestive and selfish to barge in and control my life constantly sending me these messages. I feel all drained! Like they soaked the goodness outta me. They don't understand life. They don't live it! Sorry Orlando, too, me running into poor, weird people. These people single me out and don't ever listen to me worried about my race and how because of my parents I turned out. I was doing fine until something happened. See, they are sinners. That just proves it. I had a miserable life, as though it weren't my parents fault. I was that dorky looking figure of a person with straight black hair cut in a bob with bangs.. What do they do now? Act like they can control me. They keep saying I'm shit because of who each of them is. But they do what they want. They don't want me ahead. How sick is that? People don't like me cuza that. I won't live this life! Something's going down. I'm already 28. No, I do not want to get back totally at my parents. They did let me go thru schools that teach nothing in social studies. I don't think slaying them would be the answer. This isn't TV. That's not what I meant by "going down.." I would not mean that obscurely.. so. At least, I explained this one. So, what is this? Is my life that bad because of one thing? I am always really good.
(1) people who experiment on me, nurses, psychologists, "social scientists"
(2) my dad
(3) Ellen DeGeneres
(4) other people who are popular like Ellen DeGeneres
I get the messages from them thru little noises like clicking in my room, which is the garage. It also comes thru being in contact with others, usually my parents, who have their own nasty messages. The computer loads suspiciously, as well, almost every time to me it feels, at least on certain parts.
The messages are little insults to startle me and make me feel out-of-control for some reason, maybe in anticipation of what they chose to do to me, legal or not legal. Hey, I even got hints that they crash planes and kill people to stimulate me, like say Ellen decided to do it, and she wouldn't just say no cuz maybe she thinks there is some case where her royal highness can give such decrees.
I don't know why I'm bad to people. I only got mad if someone did something to me!! You're supposed to, like you getting mad at me for no real reason. I do little things for fun or sometimes slip up a little, like in attitude, and this is what I get, the one who is called Miss Perfect by the whole class? That's suggestive and selfish to barge in and control my life constantly sending me these messages. I feel all drained! Like they soaked the goodness outta me. They don't understand life. They don't live it! Sorry Orlando, too, me running into poor, weird people. These people single me out and don't ever listen to me worried about my race and how because of my parents I turned out. I was doing fine until something happened. See, they are sinners. That just proves it. I had a miserable life, as though it weren't my parents fault. I was that dorky looking figure of a person with straight black hair cut in a bob with bangs.. What do they do now? Act like they can control me. They keep saying I'm shit because of who each of them is. But they do what they want. They don't want me ahead. How sick is that? People don't like me cuza that. I won't live this life! Something's going down. I'm already 28. No, I do not want to get back totally at my parents. They did let me go thru schools that teach nothing in social studies. I don't think slaying them would be the answer. This isn't TV. That's not what I meant by "going down.." I would not mean that obscurely.. so. At least, I explained this one. So, what is this? Is my life that bad because of one thing? I am always really good.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Attn: Christina.