Sneaky Backwards Thinking

When I said I want to make myself "want to live," they didn't care about me, just got mad, like cuza race partly.

Problem

I didn't mean anything.  Some of what happened was mean.  There keeps on being so many downsets in life when I'm trying to make myself "want to live."

Problem

My dad seems mad, like he always wants to make sure he's better than me.

Problem

Why is my dad mean to me every time I see him?

Problem

People are lying like I never do things, that I'm not a person alive, but others did.  I have a problem there but not the one of which others speak.

Problem

People are being mean to me and trying to cover it up.

Problem

I don't want to put anyone in danger, but it seems they did something to my family on purpose because of things I did.

I have said things by accident I hope I can leave behind, but apparently it's a favorite blaming tool.. sad.  I don't tell people to their face mean things.  It's on my blog or the IMDb message boards, mostly.. not much tho, not too many of those repeated mistakes..  I thought we were "supposed to let it out" etc.  I guess not!!  How utterly confusing.  Why wasn't I warned?  I am just around constant meanness!!  I just like used the word "m********ing" but not in the attack way.  I realize it seems inappropriate.  It was on a message board.  I've seen inappropriate things go by unchecked.  It was just how I was feeling, but after I found it was bad like that I haven't done that.  I was stuck cursing about the noises in my room and was upset at who might have promoted it.  I guess the worst was I used my dad to curse at rather than someone else?  Or when I did use curse words with someone else?  I dunno, maybe I was just half asleep.  I don't think I'm a bad person.  I wanted to be acceptable in the world.  I don't think it's my mom's fault.

Problem

Good people are being very mean to me!

Problem

They are trying to discipline good people like Bella Thorne and I like we're bad.  They get *** for it, technically.  I thought they were good people, too.  What did you do, "do it" but with a "cool?"  We are not stuck up.  If you give someone attention is up to you to control, sometimes.

Problem

They're bothering me in my room..

Why..

..am I being purposely and actively attacked about following Ellen DeGeneres?  I already am concerned/care.  And, no, I am not guilty: I am very interested in a lot of other people.  This sure popped up by surprise, considering I care.

Problem

They flashed something across my new TV like it's broken.

I'm not mad about my family..

..but worried.  They are always like this.  My dad even acted like he said, "It's both."  Well, I won't accept it if it's bad..

Whatever

So, they're mean to me and tell me I'm the bad person.

I know this is some overarching issue, but in a way it isn't.

Problem

I felt threatened, not just uncomfortable.

Problem

Why?  I wanted this to go well.

Problem

They have Bella Thorne asleep in London.

They said, "Bello," at the start of the Emmys.

They said, "Nello," and something like, "You can't have Ellen."

Why do they keep acting like I did something?  I know I was upset at them in between and then they got meaner.

Problem

They keep acting like I'm bad!

Problem

My parents set up to eat when the Emmy's start.

Problem

I'm about to have supper and know they will be outlining the "events" "of the day."

Problem

They're just acting silly and won't stop.

Problem

They just tried to give my body the feeling of developing an extra knob of skin.

You must be insane.

So what if I get upset?  You all do.  You can't go in and destroy my life thinking I'm some n*****.  Speaking of which, you were mean to me.  I don't just start acting up.  I want to avoid all these bad things..

The New Thing

They are having people act like they feel bad pleasure.

Problem

My dad is setting things up so my grandma and aunt are different rather than me just a good girl with an extended family.

Problem

What's wrong with my family?

Problem

My mom was messing with my toenail and it feels enlarged and numb.

Problem

My grandma and aunt continue to, upset, influence my life, acting like I'm bad.

Hey

My mom seems mad at me.

Problem

They are acting like I'm bad and so my blog is a crime.

Problem

I'm just posting my opinion on my blog, didn't click post, and they said, "I'm it... I'm not checking it."  See, I get things worse for doing something where for once I'm right.

More

Meanness from someone.. Indefinite

Lost It

They said my life "would not be it in a month," how violent, just because I stomped my foot some etc. in private.

Problem

People keep affecting my toes.

Problem

I was upset yesterday my parents were bugging me and just stomped etc. in private some.

I got that I can't really "meet" 3 females, including my mom.

Problem

My mom keeps acting with a mean attitude.

Problem

Supposedly, Ellen DeGeneres was able to cause something bad to my family I can't talk about.

Problem

They keep bothering me.

Problem

They keep trying to make me feel like I'm bad!!

Problem

I keep getting attacked.

Problem

The Twitter icon blinked when I was done.

Problem

Why do you think I don't matter?