Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Perpetuation

They keep saying things to ruin my life but help others.  Like, "you're gonna d**."  "You don't know so-and-so."  "Don't think about such-and-such."

I'm sick of

being caught up in people, like I've done something, to them/others's lives.

Problem

They tried to make sure what I said was denied.

Problem

They are still having someone I like say mean things.

I don't feel the force exactly with me, happened earlier today, too.

Off to Bed

Sorry to anyone who finds any of this wrong.

Upset

I don't need a cutesy act like dropping pellets in my bowl.  I will not do something this stupid.  I mean, if someone acts weirdly and inhumanly around me, I have a right to dislike it.  I'm not crazy.  No offense to anyone.  They were being picky about it just now and didn't even make sense.

Apology

I dunno, but I got a funny message and it was kinda annoying.

They just made me feel lesser and off, too.  Like with my surroundings.  Someone went in for the k***.  They, whoever that is, sure are bossy and ignorant of things, feelings, how to deal with emotions.

Whatever it was.. I don't like this new detachment/attachment I'm feeling with my surroundings.  How will I get better and know if it's back to normal?  They illuminated it.

Apology

I don't want anyone tossing and turning over something I said that's okay but seen a certain way.  It makes me wonder about that catch phrase.  It's like everything I say is bad.  I did change the arrangement.  I guess how you treat me just kinda comes up in its own good time.  I wonder if you can think of a better way of saying or not saying that.  Maybe, I just have to suffer the special effects for myself.  Make sure these superstitions don't turn viral into a problem.  I'll be interested to know what the problem is in people's fetishes of interpretation and false associations for whatever reason, seems to exist, at least I think I know.  It is a weird thing to say, in a way, what I said.  I tried to change it and used the phrase just on myself.  It still seems a source of negative energy.  Some things are "best left unsaid," others I dunno.. I know the time thinking can go overboard into impossibility, at least for me in my experience, I think.  Ugh!  So hard, but sorry, whatever it is.

Apology

I am sorry I was upset on my walk.  I need to clean up my act and shape up.

Problem

They are hurting me more..

Problem

They are turning things that I did that aren't that bad into legends to center on.  *Beep*  I wonder if they had to pay to get people to promote things like that.  Some people have *beep*d up my relationships with other people in the world.  What do you think I am, some toy for sinners to experiment on and play around with?

Sneaking up on Me!!

They acted like someone else deserves someone I care about and not me like at all anymore.

I was upset once by accident about something like that, so what!!

What about me?

Why is Ellen acting like I'm punished every day?  Who do you think I am?  What's this, a long time/forever, just joking around laughing at me?  This all sounds very illegal to me.

I don't mean to be mean and risque.

I can deal with this.  }:)  Or can I?  I'll still come posting here about my irritations.

WHAT IS THIS ARE YOU CRAZY

the world going against me?  They're rubbing in my dad.  I'm not even supposed to be with him, necessarily, tho I would like a good relationship and not sure how much I should still be with my parents.

Edit

Post edited.

Is that a threat?

I CAN GROW IF I WANT AND YOU BETTER NOT FIND ME GUILTY AND STOP ME

Why are you picking at my last posting style?

Why are you picking at my last posting style?

Being Mean..

This person they said made me close to my dad.  That's not something I want.  I already have a working relationship or used to.

THEY WON'T STOP

THEY WON'T STOP

What

You all think you're pretty tricky?  This is cheap and dirty.

Problem

I keep feeling the "tickle" of my dad.

I don't care about

Ellen and people going crazy that I'm some loon in trouble.  I'm being violated.  Like it doesn't matter--but just for me.

I don't wanna sit here

listening for perverted things said to me that shouldn't be.

I don't care if I kick if I'm mad.

Problem

They are telling me things I don't wanna hear, that I'm doing something tackily, and I have a "kick" in someone who's not my mom.