I keep seeing all over TV that people sound like someone, or for someone. I said something that meant something else and almost said something else I was so mad, but I didn't mean anything bad about them and they weren't there. Everyone thinks I'm points off. I was upset someone else may have done something bad to them. That's what I was trying to express. What do I do? Give up on life as it is while the world goes on? There are more important things in the world than taking out anger on me. Sorry? I mean, who else has to live by things like this? I understand something happening or me getting help. I am not bad nor am I to this person. You know, people treat me badly when I'm around them, like I have to bow down. True, this is dangerous. Someone seemed to have these people be mean and standoffish to me.
Another person. I spammed people when I was suicidal for attention sorta. Now, the world seems to think weird things, like that fame makes you go coocoo and feel drunk and like your having sex and other things to dream about. It seems like something they are onto. That's why.
Disney made things off people I know and like I didn't exist sorta feel in some way. It just feels defiant. I guess they have it together, but I still felt insulted by some messages. I mean, I don't need it, but I felt insulted. It's like some of them are just human and doing things to get back at me ever since my life went down after me finding out I was being spied on. They're also mean to me now. They keep saying someone like me deserves this bad treatment.
I'm sorry. I just don't get how ever since moving to Orlando, my life has been totaled. I get in situations, and big things seem to come by. Sorry? is not okay? :( I know they say if I say sorry anyone can. I feel bad about mistakes, but they rub them in like I woulda done them had I known. Ever since Charlie and the Chocolate Factory came out, people acted like it was time to "stop, drop, and roll." My life is ruined because of things that came about from that movie. No one forgives me for anything, so unlike all those stubborn selfish people I can't "move on" as people would encourage them to. I didn't even do anything to them. It didn't have anything to do with people it seemed. It's like clockwork. I'm already 30. I was 21 just yesterday. It seems I don't matter, in a way.
I am wondering what my point is. It's the TV I noticed. I bet a lotta people are worried. I guess it's okay, but I don't like being seen as bad. Sometimes, the person they are concerned about but maybe still don't treat right seems like if at this age got mad at me could really hurt me. We need to be concerned, but I know people just push me to be viscous. I wonder if people are so happy in general a lotta them because my life is hard. They think I'm not better than them anymore. They think I have "problems" like them.
I'm sorry, but I mean no offense nor intention of being uncomfortable. I just don't get why every last straw is I'm bad. Sorry to those involved. Why do other people get chances and I get told I am just ill-willed?
No matter this is a long post I hope. I'm not superstitious and think a lot of information can be a good thing sometimes.
Well, hope everyone is having a good night, tho we don't have Hillary as President. I like Republican, tho. I don't know much about Trump except that he was likely to win maybe sometimes.
Sorry for what disturbs you I do wrong and sorry people are involved. I just am exploring what's going on, not trying to seem mean. I'm not the one attacking anyone and not "forgiving."
Oh, no, and then there's the issue with me being upset thinking Ellen DeGeneres put hurtful, illegal noises in my room a long time. I've been at this too much and am tired. I already said I didn't then try to send bad messages, knowingly. I was mad and cursed about the action, not cursing out her. I probably slipped, tho, but that's not the jist of things, I think.
I got lots to do, need to pack for a trip that will be on Friday. Getting tired and behind on laundry. Oh, and that's so bad. I was upset when I did my laundry yesterday. I should have not been so mad. I wonder what's wrong with me. Maybe, I should be locked up. It was bad for election day. I didn't have that in my head, and people all were at me and I didn't know why I was so upset.
Hope I didn't miss anything. I said sorry. I should focus on being nicer to others. I should go to church more maybe sometime again. I don't know if I can fix it in other people's opinion. They think I'm no good. Oh well, maybe I will figure it out. Maybe, it's time to go to confession and tell a priest and see if I'm that bad. They won't solve it, tho, leave that to me to see to. They are too busy. I guess, they have homilies and daily mass. They are smart, tho, but work hard I bet.
Yikes, look how much I posted about things here. Is it bad or good? I was careful and explained myself. I just want these things to get better. I don't want it to be from me in a bad way too big a deal. Okay, let's hope that I get put to justice. I might secretly not believe that. Yea, I get treated tough compared to others, like I'm bad.
I'm disturbed people will think I was onto someone in this in a weird way. Believe what you will. That's not my intention. Ay ay ay, I'm sorta going braindead. Yikes!
So, sorry, hope you felt comfortable and were able to size me to justice. I guess they'll want to do something to me.
I don't mean to be onto something, but I guess that's what's important.
I mean, I'm not begging about something it might seem, but maybe that's "what" I ended up seeming to do.
Sorry for all my oddities today.
Oh dear, and the election. What if it's my fault? I probably affected it. Let's focus on what's important. I hope that doesn't include berating me.
I hope everyone is doing well. I hope you will make a blog and problems blog of your own!
I am so embarrassed how long this is, but things on this blog come about like that.
I wonder if something happened to my hands that won't get better. I wonder if I had pressure or something. That makes me sad. I talked about that in a prior post. Okay, so I'm disturbed and maybe hurt on that. I didn't even hurt anyone with that and not in any way on purpose.
Let's end with a prayer and blessing? Dear God, please help me to be a good, functioning person. Bless the people who are somehow a part of my life. May everyone's dreams come true and we be far from another "crucifix" in things. Let us hope we can make everyone's dreams figured out and be on an okay path. Help us to deal with anything unexpected and hurtful. Thanks to those in our lives who make it how it's special or something. Amen. In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, Amen.
Ehehe, funny how I tried to write a little prayer.
Guess I'd better get on. Tired but want to do laundry and pack, sometime soon.
Sorry about some of the things I brought up, but a lot of it was wondering why I'm bad. I hope I do not make anyone uncomfortable. I just was wondering about some things but not others, to some degree. Okay? :( Sorry. I talked about several different things that exist. That's why it's so long.
Well. Okay? Sorry.
Good night! Have a good one.