I am partly ambiguous. Obviously, I wouldn't have thought any of the little I did if I knew it was wrong to someone nice.. hopefully for unselfish and sensible reasons.
I should sit here and hone in on them. I was not really mad towards them but could be made to feel that way.
More..
I'm not mad at them, but I could be made to believe I was. I'm kinda upset they got upset for what I did, as in sad. I knew already not to think of them, but the places were there for those thoughts.
More..
I know for instance in Europe they can curse and no one will k*** them and they are still upstanding Europeans. I have a limited vocabulary and am being put up like I don't try to be nice.
I did get upset at something but not at them. With them, I am not upset. Their lives are manipulated. They don't have to do what they do. I wish people would act normally and not sacrifice to either show off or be "too nice" and say hi but get upset later etc. You get the picture.
I'm very sorry I know my original thoughts were off.. I know I was being lazy not to talk about it on a problems blog nor to physically sift thru my thoughts.. yet emitted a certain negative air. You get the picture.
I am sorry today I told myself hatred for the weird noises cuz I see that hurt their feelings. I was "trying to get it out." I guess I can try harder.. You know, this is kinda rough and unfair to me.
I saw that my dad likes me, but it's hard for people to like me who are younger than my dad/parents. I feel unlikable now.