Maybe, I feared for the wrong person on the wrong side at the wrong time?  I guess my dad is a danger and you were trying to deflect that.  He has no right to pretend to punish me and acting like he didn't, like acting threateningly on a whim that I can't visit relatives up north.  I know if I listened, he'd go more on a tangent telling me what to do when he can't.  I wanted to go up north with him a few times but chickened out.  He didn't force me to go, tho, nor say then that anything was wrong.  You know, he almost pushed his oldest younger sister off a counter or table or something when she was a baby.  I feel iffy about if she thinks I'm being a good person in the secret messages via the experiment where people watch me and talk to me with little noises in my room and things.